Whiplash and Weggies

We had a wonderful time in Salt Lake City with family this past week.  But we did have an incident at the water slides.  My idea of a good time at the water slides is a beach towel, book and dip in the water to cool off!  The whole idea is to let the boys run wild while I RELAX!  Alas, it was not to be.  Brian isn't as much of a daredevil as Ethan and there was one slide he refused to go on called "THE BOOMERANG".  (I have since learned that Brian is wise beyond his years)
"Come on, Mom.  Come with me."  Ethan calls.
"Sure, why not."
Ethan carries our two person tube up the stairs.  I should have been warned when I heard the disclaimer playing on the speakers, but it really wasn't loud and there were other moms waiting in line so surely I could handle it!
Let me tell you a bit about THE BOOMERANG.  It looks like one of those skateboard ramps that you skate down and then go up the other side.  But this one you sit in your tube.  You are told by the experienced lifeguard (who looks twelve and I'm sure would not be able to lift me if I were to be rendered unconscious on this ride) to keep your chin down and your bum up.  Is this some weird form of pilates I don't know about?  She informs us that the heavier person goes in the back.  Ethan looks at me smugly and says: "That would be you."
Into the tube I go, still thinking that this will be okay.  I tuck my chin in, squeeze my but up (no small feat!), and close my eyes tight!  (Do you think I really WANT to see this?)

The next thing I remember is my neck snapping back so hard that I actually HEAR the cracking sound.  I am sure I have been in an accident.  Where is my protective air bag?  But we are not done.  I feel my body whipping up the next part of THE BOOMERANG.  Snap of the neck again and back down.  Up, down, up, down...slowly coming to a stop in the centre;  where another twelve year old tells me to exit quickly.  Exit Quickly?  Does she not know that I have lost all ability to keep my head upright?  And that is when I realize my other problem...I dropped my bum!  My swimming suit is so firmly shoved up my butt that I am certain the jaws of life will be needed to retrieve it.  And there is Ethan standing there, waiting for me to climb out of the tube.  I take a few seconds to find my swimming suite because really, no one needs to see that! and then some how managed to get out of the tube.

Ethan grabs the tube and grins, "That was great!  Do you wanna go again?"

Are you kidding me?  I feel like an infant with a wobbly head and I can't walk in a straight line cause my equilibrium is still messed up.

For three days I had to support my head to lay down or get up; and what did my sensitive boys do?  They still call me "WHIPLASH MOM" and giggle every time we talk about it.  Really, I blame Dan.  If he had come to Utah with us, this never would have happened.  He would have gone on THE BOOMERANG and I would have laid on my beach towel, read my book and dipped when I got too hot!